Some ideas we've run across:

• Your cute and cuddly birthday themes: teddy bears, Winnie-the-Pooh, Care Bears, etc. These are extremely popular from what I can tell, and it's one of the ideas that crosses gender lines. Boys and girls love teddy bears, all the characters from Winnie-the-Pooh (my daughter has a favorite stuffed bear full of fluff that she loves to hug and kiss). What's great about themes like this is the abundance of material you can find in stores. When we were checking out birthday balloons, it seemed like every other one had a Care Bear or a Winnie-the-Pooh character on it.
• Your girly themes: Princesses are still all the rage. And pink, pink, pink! This is classic and easy to implement. You'll never have trouble finding pink paper plates, napkins and forks. Pink ribbon and pink streamers are abundant. Princess balloons are everywhere. It's also a cute theme. What father doesn't think of his daughter as a princess?
• Sesame Street: Your baby has probably had some introduction to Sesame Street already. Baby J. absolutely loves the Sesame Street songs. We purchased her a DVD of their most popular songs, and she loves it. There's something about watching "Monster in the Mirror" or "I'd Like to Visit the Moon" that completely captivates her. For the only time in her day, she becomes immobile, totally fixed on the music and the lyrics. Aside from that, Baby J. loves the Sesame Street books; my wife still had a few from when she was a kid that we read to Baby J. each evening. So if you're like us, your kid probably recognizes Sesame Street, and so it might be a fun theme for him or her.
• Animal Themes: There are your basic animal-related themes, like the rubber ducky themes. Get some rubber ducks and put them around the house, use yellow streamer, have a bubble blowing machine, the possibilities seem limitless. Or there's your farm animal theme. Your kid probably has a play barn. Baby J. obsesses over the cow and the lamb. She knew what a cow was before she could recognize the word "dog". All those farm animals are second nature to your child.
• Your Classic Boy Themes: Cars and trucks. Sports. This is another one of those themes where you won't have any trouble whatsoever finding any of the supplies you need. From birthday balloons with baseballs and footballs on them to toy cars and trucks, you won't have any trouble decorating your house. There are so many cake pans in the shapes of cars or sports equipment as well. I don't know how much your one year old will be into sports, but you have to keep in mind, the first birthday is probably more about you and your friends and family than your little one. He/she is there to enjoy the ride, not to be an active part of the planning.

I'll describe in greater detail what we chose as our theme in an additional post.

D.

One thing to note: teething is somewhat hereditary, if the mother or father of the baby teethed early, it's more likely the baby will teethe early. Most children have a full set of teeth by the time they are 2 to 3 years of age. These teeth last until roughly the age of six. Typically, the teeth that were first to appear will be the teeth that are first to fall out. Now I'm getting a little ahead of myself.

Which teeth come in first?

At six to seven months, the incisors (the two central top and bottom teeth) typically show themselves. Some babies are later and some are earlier. Baby J. started teething around five months.

What are the symptoms of teething?

Once again, the symptoms vary drastically from child to child. It's helpful to check with your pediatrician. They're better able to tell if your baby is teething. They know what to look for in your baby's mouth, such as teeth budding just below the surface.

Crankiness: Your happy, usually delighted baby, is suddenly cranky all the time. This is the most common symptom we've encountered. Baby J. is usually happy all the time, but the lack of sleep and the pain in her mouth leaves her cranky all the time. She yells more. Things that normally don't bother her, bug her a lot.

Drooling: Excessive drooling is very common during the teething phase. The problem here is that most babies are droolers around the six to seventh month period when the first teeth start to show. However, the amount of drooling that precedes the eruption of a tooth is usually far greater than your baby's day-to-day, typical drooling. Sometimes, it's like they're drooling buckets. Expect loose stools to accompany the drooling. Your baby will be swallowing a lot of that excess saliva, and as a result, watery diapers are a norm.

Face rash and coughing: Because of the excessive drool, it's not uncommon for your baby to develop a rash around his/her chin and to cough more often. Cleaning your baby's face regularly will help reduce the rash.

Biting: The pain caused by the teeth shifting under the gums and getting ready to erupt results in a baby that bites...everything. Biting helps ease the pain in the jaw. It applies pressure to the gums thus making the gums feel a bit better. So your baby, who is normally fairly gentle with you, might suddenly lunge at you and bite at you, especially your hard fingers. Give your baby a lot of teething toys, especially the ones that can go in the freezer; the extra cold toys will help numb the sore points in your baby's mouth.

Ear Pulling: The pain caused by the teeth coming in radiates through the jaw and causes severe pain in the ears. Your baby might start tugging her ears really hard. Beware though, this can also be a sign that your child has an earache. Check for inflammation and redness in the ear, and check with your pediatrician. Earaches can be severe and can lead to hearing loss. This is coming from someone, who as a baby experienced horrible earaches, and as a result, I have permanent hearing loss.

Low-Grade Fever: This is one of those symptoms that is debated by pediatricians. Some people swear that teething causes fever. Others say that it's just a coincidence, that during this time in your baby's life, they are more prone to illnesses that cause fevers. I tend to meet them halfway. I'm not a doctor, so it's guesswork, but I believe that the teething process, which wears down your baby physically due to the lack of sleep and the rawness of their gums makes them more susceptible to bacterias and other germs that result in fever. Either way you look at it, if your baby is experiencing a fever accompanied by some of these other symptoms, it's more likely they might be teething.

How can I ease my child's pain?

Teething rings, especially those that can go in the freezer, are a good way to help. He/she will chew the rings, relieving pressure on the gums, and the cold ring will help numb the sore, raw points. Cold food can help too. If you usually give your baby a warm bottle, try giving them a nice, cold bottle. Baby J. always preferred an ice cold bottle. The same goes if your baby is eating solids. Just because you prefer your foods warm that doesn't mean your baby would mind an icy snack. Cold applesauce, chilled yogurts, cold pears and other fruits really help numb the pain.

Infant tylenol and when the pediatrician gives the ok, infant motrin, can help the pain, when nothing else will. When Baby J. is at her worst and the pain is keeping her up all night, we usually turn to one of these medicines. She can't realistically chew on teething rings in her sleep, so the medicine is the only thing that will keep her from waking every few minutes in excruciating pain. Baby orajel can help, if you know the spot in the gums that's the problem, you can apply orajel directly to those affected areas, helping to numb the pain.

Don't Worry...

Eventually, the tooth or teeth will erupt. When the teeth come out, the pain immediately subsides. Your baby will return to their usual self. It's the waiting that leaves us impatient parents in dire straits.

D.

But the real reason I bring this up isn't to reaffirm what I already believe. And it's not to convince readers who spank their kids that spanking is wrong. It's to show the problem with studies. I already have my mind made up. I already believe that spanking is unnecessary. How likely is it that the people who conducted the study showing that spanking leads to aggressive toddlers also already had it made up in their minds that spanking led to behavioral issues? It's also likely that the people conducting the study that showed spanking led to better behavior probably had it made up in their minds that was the case.

It shows no good parent should ever blindly listen to studies. There is too much research that contradicts other research. It is too easy for results to be manipulated, even unintentionally, to favor a particular result. These studies rarely delve deeply enough into the history of those being studied to factor out other variables that may be impacting the results. It's entirely possible that someone who spanks their kid will have a kid that doesn't exhibit any aggressive behavior, who performs immaculately in school. Just like it's entirely possible that someone who never spanks their kid will have a child that is aggressive and performs poorly in thinking abilities. There are other factors at play. Do the parents sit down with their child and teach them, read to them, learn with them? Do the parents teach them the correct way to handle a situation they don't like? These studies rarely if ever ask more questions. They're interested only in attaining a result based on a single factor.

So, my best advice to parents, don't ignore the research and the studies, but take the studies with a grain of salt. Use logic. If a study seems completely contrary to your own beliefs, do further research, find other studies, read up on it, ask other parents, ask your own parents. There's a wealth of information out there, and I don't think any single source is ever completely right on a subject.

I think the trick is not cursing ever. Not just when she's in the room, but all the time. Maybe I should get a swear jar or something. Do those help? Every time I curse, I plunk a quarter in the jar. Eventually, I should learn not to do it, right? Old habits die hard, so I'm really going to have to be conscious of this all the time.

D.

Reading with Baby

I cannot overemphasize the important of reading to your child, even a child as young as a few days old. Well, ok, I could overemphasize it, I could say something crazy like, "If you don't read to your child, the sun will explode." But still, I made my point: reading is very important.

Ever since Baby J. came home from the hospital, we have been reading to her. We read to her every night. We read to her during playtime. We read to her at each nap. Already, my daughter has developed a love affair with books. She can't read the words, but she recognizes them when we read the books to her. She remembers the pictures, and she associates the pictures with words. I've read her a book with cows in it many times, and the other day, one of us read that book, and she got up, grabbed a toy cow and brought it over to us.

When you talk to your child, you don't tend to make associations, at least not all of the time. It's too difficult to always do that in conversation. How often can I remember that every time I talk I need to point to things about which I'm speaking? Or that when I'm having a conversation with her, I need emphasize the important words? Reading takes care of that for you.

Also, reading this early has made my daughter love books. Recently, bathtime was abyssmal. Every time we put her in the bath, she got upset. She couldn't stand it. Then, we got one of those water books, the kind of plastic pages so it's ok for the bath. Now, when it comes to bathtime, she sits calmly, and I read her book to her while she looks at each page and points at all the pictures.

And at naptime and bedtime, reading her books consistently has become part of the routine. When we read her the last book of the night, she becomes drowsy. She makes the association with reading before bed with getting ready for sleep. And it makes putting her down for the night that much easier.

Getting your child to love books early on means it's going to be that much easier to get them to love reading later on. She already loves books. It's not going to be nearly as difficult to sit down with her and teach her the alphabet and teach her how to sound out words and how to read sentences than it would have been had she never had any interest in books. A lifetime love affair with reading will mean our baby will perform better in school, she will better understand comprehension, she will be better equipped to learn on her own.

D.

It's made a big difference. Baby J. stays warm all night. She doesn't wake as often. A lot of the books will say that because your baby has never had a blanket or a pillow, they don't know what they're missing. But I think Baby J. knew. She loves blankets. And though we don't give her a pillow, whenever she's playing with us in the morning in our big bed, she usually rests her head on the pillow and gets a huge smile on her face. Babies aren't stupid. I think they know that blankets and pillows sure beat pajamas and a flat surface alone.

When it's cold outside, I've got the month of May.
Well, I guess you'll say, what can make me feel this way?
My girl...

D.

Baby J. searching for more pancake

Baby J. keeps impressing me with what foods she loves right away. She tried pancakes tonight, and at first, I thought she wasn't into them. I gave her little pieces she could chew, and she just kept looking at them funny, and then tossing them over her shoulder. My wife said, "Give her a big piece and see what she does." Baby J. took a half pancake, and she devoured it. She gobbled it up. She tore it apart, and she ate every little piece. I guess she just doesn't like being given little pieces. She wants the whole pie.

Today was a lot better than the crummy day we had yesterday. We looked it up, and apparently, EVERYONE complains about Sears' photo studio. I guess they have this policy where if the people working there make sales of less than $150 repeatedly, they are fired. I'm starting to understand why the woman we had kept pushing everything down our throats and tried to tell us our coupons weren't valid. What a way to run a business. Has Sears ever considered that maybe, just maybe, they should consider their customers? Maybe if they weren't so pushy and conniving, I might have been willing to spend more money. Maybe if they hadn't rushed us through and given us so few pictures to choose from, I might have had more pictures I wanted to actually purchase.

It isn't rocket science.

Tip of the day: Take your own pictures and have them printed for cheap. Save yourself a lot of money and torment.

D.

Oops, looks like I fell asleep during my turn

My wife and I have adopted a simple system of taking turns. One morning, I'll get a little extra sleep, while she gives the baby the bottle. The next morning, I'll let her sleep some more. One night, I'll handle the bath. The next night, she will. If my wife put the baby down for her last nap, then I'll handle getting her down that night.

We found from way back at the beginning that this was the only way we could really handle things. When Baby J. had her nights and days mixed up, we would take turns, staying up all night long with Baby J. We'd give the other 2-3 hours of sleep, before we'd hand the baby over. It was better than one of us having to stay up all night, and it was the only way to deal with a reflux baby, who had a terrible bout of colic (she liked to scream and cry for hours, and the only effective response to this, was to stay up the entire time rocking her).

I bring it up, because I know some people who never get to take turns, some people who are with the baby all day while their spouse is at work. And then, when the spouse gets home, they don't get relief, they're still taking care of the baby, giving the bath, getting him/her down for sleep. I don't know how it's done. I couldn't do it. I know how exhausting Daddy Daughter Days are and those usually don't last more than 8 hrs before my wife comes back into the picture to help out. If I had 24 hr long Daddy Daughter Days 7 days a week, I'm sure I'd be clinically insane by now. So, for those who do it, how do you do it? How do you keep from going insane?

D.

Baby J. Dressed for Bedtime

Are you having trouble getting your baby to sleep through the night? How many hours is he or she sleeping at night, before waking up? How much sleep are you getting yourself? For us, we were lucky at first. Baby J. naturally fell into a pattern of sleeping through the night at around 4 months of age. We didn't have to do anything. No tricks. No special bedtime routines. It was like we were suddenly gifted with a great sleeper (after a couple rough months of always waking up due to reflux).

Then, Baby J.'s first tooth came at around 5 months. While she was teething, we weren't expecting her to sleep too well. Teething leaves babies in a general state of wakefulness, and we weren't surprised when she went from sleeping through the night to waking up every couple hours, crying and needing to be held. After the tooth was finished coming out, we kind of expected Baby J. to return to her original sleep pattern.

She didn't.

In fact, she continued sleeping as though she were teething. She must have grown accustomed to being picked up and held every couple hours, and tooth or no tooth, she wasn't about to stop on our account. After a few days of this, two cranky, exhausted parents decided something had to be done.

Don't Forget the Bath Right Before Bed

There are a few schools of thought on getting your baby to sleep through the night. There's the all-out "cry it out" method, where you plunk the little one into his/her crib, leave the room, and see them again in the morning. Some people say this utterly cruel, and you should never treat a baby in this fashion. Despite not using this exact method, I don't agree with those people. Your kid will be just fine if you let them cry it out. They'll be perfectly happy the next day. You know what your child needs more than being picked up and coddled all the time? They need a good night's rest. And crying it out isn't something that takes months and months, it takes three days tops. So, if you're considering this method, don't think you're the worst parent in the world, you're simply doing you and your baby something good that's going to (after three days most likely) get both of you a lot more rest.

The method we did try was a modification of the "cry it out" method. It's pretty simple. You put your baby in the crib. Pat them for about a minute, say "good night", and then you leave the room. They will cry. They will bawl. They will scream. This is perfectly normal. Come back in five minutes, lay them down (if they're like Baby J. and they've been standing and pulling at the crib like its a prison cage), pat them for about a minute, shush them, say "good night", and then leave. This time, wait ten minutes before coming back. Keep doubling your time. Unless you have an incredible stubborn baby, they'll probably figure out after two or three times of being laid back into their crib, patted and wished a "good night" that it's time they slept. This method isn't quite as effective as the traditional "cry it out", but it gets fast results. It only took us three days before Baby J. got the big picture and went down immediately without any more fussing. Now, she sleeps 12 hours each night from 7pm to 7am.

Remember, the most important rule is, once your baby has entered the crib for the night, he/she does NOT come back out until morning. Unless they have a giant soiled diaper or there is clearly something wrong with the child, resist the temptation to pick him/her up. Getting picked up will only encourage them to cry and fuss more the next time you put them down. The second night we tried this, I made the mistake of picking up Baby J. She cried and screamed after I put her down for four hours, because she was so convinced I'd pick her up again.

Here are some other tips for getting your baby ready at night:

1. Set a bed time. Preferably make it around 6:30pm to 7:30pm. If you make your baby wait too long to go to bed, they will get overtired. And an overtired baby is actually much harder to get to sleep than a well rested baby. Sometimes, Baby J. sleeps the longest when she's taken a nap an hour or so before her bed time. It keeps her fresh, and she's less cranky for the long night.
2. Make bedtime as routine as possible. It's a good idea to give him/her a bath right before bed time every night. Put lotion on after the bath. Dress them up in some warm pajamas, and then give them a bottle while you read to them (reading is so important, even at this early stage, don't forget it). For older babies with teeth, brush their teeth after they have finished with their bottle. If they absolutely need some sort of comfort, and they're old enough, give them some water (but don't keep giving them breast milk or formula, it will encourage them to stay up).
3. Not really a bedtime tip, but make sure your baby gets naps. A couple of naps a day will mean your baby will be less tired by evening time. This also makes everything easier, like mealtime. A baby should be getting 2-3 hours of nap time a day. Some babies don't let you know when they're tired, so try to set roughly fixed times as to when your baby should be napping such as an hour after breakfast or an hour after lunch; the more routine the naps are, the more likely he/she will go down at those designated nap times.

Remember too, you may have to "reteach" your baby to sleep through the night after certain episodes that affect their sleeping pattern, such as teething, a cold, the flu, etc.

That's all I can think of right now. Hmm, let me know if you have any further tips that might help people that read this post.

D.

Baby J. in her Superhero Costume

Whenever I've told anyone about Baby J.'s hip dysplasia as a newborn, I'm usually met with one of two responses, either, "What the heck is hip dysplasia?" or "Oh, I had that as a kid." I was actually surprised to learn it was more common than I thought. For those who don't know, the easiest way to explain it is that the femur (the thigh bone) doesn't quite fit right into the hip joint, either because the hip joint is too large (and hasn't finished closing around the femur), or the hip joint and the femur just aren't really lining up.

Examples of Hip Dysplasia

Baby J. had the problem that her hip joint was too large and not finished growing correctly around the femur (pretty much what you see in example C on the left). As a result, she had to wear a Pavlik harness, which is this ugly thing that wraps around her shoulders, hips and feet in order to keep the legs positioned in such a way that the hip can form correctly around the femur. To make ourselves feel better about the awful contraption she was forced to wear, we often referred to it as her "superhero costume". She was lucky though, some cases of hip dysplasia are so severe that the child has to be in traction for a period of time (I could only imagine how well that would have went with a baby that constantly wants to move).

After only about a month of wearing the harness, Baby J. was able to have it off for short periods of time, and then after a few more visits to her hip doctor, she was able to lose the harness at all. I won't go into much detail, but we had a lot of issues with our hip doctor; he kept trying to bilk us out of more money, even after Baby J.'s hips were completely healed. Despite three separate ultrasounds that all showed her hips were perfectly fine, despite nurses and her own pediatrician saying the hips were fine, and despite the hip doctor himself admitting that her hips were now perfectly normal, he kept trying to us to return for more and more visits. We eventually put our foot down and said enough was enough. It was a waste of money, and clearly the hip doctor was trying to keep a steady $300 paycheck from our health care provider for the five minute sessions he had wherein he simply said, "Hips look fine. Come back in three months." I know I'm ranting and completely getting off target here, but some doctors really infuriate me.

So, anyway, back to topic, I'm curious if any readers have any kids with hip dysplasia, and if so, how severe is it? My wife had it as a baby, and her case was far worse than Baby J.'s; she was forced to wear a Pavlik harness for about a year. And if you can't already imagine, those harnesses are extremely uncomfortable, hard to put on, harder yet to clean up, and an all around pain in our collective rear.

D.